Fug Soup

Fab legs, Aisha. And great shoes. But that weird pointilist nightmare of a dress is so short, I can tell what your fallopian tubes are doing.

Fugisha Tyler

We're through the looking glass here, people.

No, seriously. This crushed-velvet nightmare -- aside from indicating that there may not be any hope for us as a society any more -- looks ripped straight from the pages of Lewis Carroll's little-known Alice sequel Twinkle Twinkle Little Bat, in which the Dormouse, drunk on tea and drooling with power, enters Alice into the Little Miss Wonderland pageant and makes her perform "The Good Ship Lollipop" before the Queen of Hearts.

I can only assume Aisha Tyler wore this because her mind has been addled with grief over her exit from The Ghost Whisperer, and she's regressed to age 10. Such a tragedy; her endless legs deserve better.

The Fug Whisperer

I caught an eyeball or two of Aisha Tyler at Fashion Week and thought to myself (as opposed to thinking to someone else. I haven't mastered that yet), in the following order:

a) Damn, she is tall and good-looking. I hate her.

b) Is that Aisha's boyfriend? Hot.

c) Is that GWYNETH PALTROW OVER THERE? No, that's a dude.

d) La Tyler's been dressing so well lately.

e) I just really love bagels."

And then this had to go and happen:

Yeah. This was not her wisest decision. I'd wager this hurts her more than that time the plane landed on her head on Ghost Whisperer and killed her off.

Fug Soup

Ever since we saw Aisha Tyler at Fashion Week one time, I have had a bit of a girl crush on her. She's so TALL and GOOD-LOOKING and she seems like she'd be fun to get a drink with and talk about boys. So it pains me to do this:

[Photo: Splash]

There is just...a lot going on here. With the spats. And the chains. And the ruffles. And the piece of hair that kind of looks like a bird of paradise. I feel like if we WERE friends and she showed up to something wearing this, I would be like, "You look....directional." And she would be like, "I thought it was just kind of fun! No? What? You have a weird look on your face." And I would say, "I don't know. It's just a LOT going on." And she would be like, "And the dress is like a really fancy shiny apron, isn't it? DAMN. I KNEW IT. I HATE MY STYLIST." And I would be like, "Here, have a mai tai," and everything would be fine.