But doesn't this photo make you wonder what, exactly, happened to Uma during her "wild year"? Based on her facial expression, I suspect that she strained her neck in the middle of yoga class -- and while she was laid up on the couch, her kids fed her enough Skittles to give her a raging cavity and then put gum in her hair everywhere but in the very back, forcing her to cut it all out and leave nothing but an awkward rat-tail. And poor Uma hasn't been able to make it to the dentist, her hair salon, OR her massage therapist because she's been too busy shopping for a bra that will fit her now that her left boob has migrated out toward Armpit Country, so she's just working through the pain and hoping no one will notice. And the In Style people were all, "Well, whatever, it's the Fall Fashion Fever issue -- it'll just look like she's the throes of a particularly debilitating case. MAKEUP! Let's get her looking flushed, people. Can you grit your teeth a bit harder, Uma? PERFECT."
Of course, that's all a guess. Maybe she just rediscovered her love of calculus and got a crick in her nape falling asleep on her open textbook, or found an old Bangles cassette and threw her neck out trying to walk like an Egyptian. Or she forgot to get a manicure and needs to hide her nails. But whatever it is causing that tension in her face, it definitely doesn't make me want to shop for pants, no matter what miracles they want to work on my thighs.
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